House of Commons
Sir Archibald Tarquin
House of Commons Wine Bar
To: Sir Graham Brady MP
Chair 1922 Committee
House of Commons
Dear Sir Graham,
I find myself compelled to write you to express my complete lack of confidence in Jeremy Corbyn.
Continue reading “Sir Graham Brady has received more than 48 letters saying they no longer have confidence in Jeremy Corbyn”
Russian supervillain, Mr Bigski’s, plan for World domination is almost complete. The last piece of the jigsaw fell into place when he assumed control of Interpol, the world’s police force.
Having orchestrated Brexit, the breakdown of global democracy, control of the oil and gas supply to the developed world, ownership of Chelsea FC and the election of Donald Trump, the Russian Supervillain’s plan to rule the world through ‘divide and conquer’ is almost complete.
Continue reading “Mr Bigski’s plan for World domination almost complete as he takes control of Interpol”
A new report today provides conclusive proof that British schools are severely overfunded, syphoning off crucial funds that could be used for the maintenance of roundabouts, the launching of a new RAF battle-zeppelin and the paying of wankers in green spectacles to come up with snappy slogans.
Continue reading “Overfunded school has too many glue sticks”
A week has passed and the world has scarcely recovered from the shock of Salah United’s appalling collapse against Red Star Belgrade. This was the Champions League’s greatest upset since Manchester United’s stunning triumph against Young Boys of Bern, in the first round of matches.
Continue reading “Outrage in Liverpool when Milner picks blue over red causing his team to lose, the silly tosser”
The Chatty Chimp is proud to help raise funds for this year’s Children-in Tweed appeal.
Every year thousands of middle and upper class children are missing out, as their parents are unable to avoid bespoke tailored tweed suits. This leaves the children at risk of bullying, exclusion and ridicule from their Peer group.
Continue reading “Help us raise money for this year’s Children in Tweed appeal”
National embarrassment of a rail company, Southern Fail, have regretfully announced that because of leaves on the line, train travellers can expect a continued programme of misery, despair and all around crappiness.
This weeks excuse is because of the unexpected arrival of autumn.
Continue reading “Southern Fail regret to announce two months of delays and cancellations due to the unexpected arrival of autumn”