Thursday evening saw Scottish football write yet another chapter in its long and illustrious footballing history as they kicked off their Euro 2020 Qualification Campaign away in Kazakhstan.
Despite having a squad decimated by as many as three injuries, the Scots named a (relatively) strong team for the Euro 2020 qualifier and, according to boss Alex McLeish, “started brightly”. It’s hard to argue with that contention when the match stats clearly show the away team held their hosts at a creditable 0-0 for almost six entire minutes. Continue reading “Scotland off to a flyer as they start their exit from Euro 2020”
After tagging his own name, a graffiti artist has got away with his crime after Police admitted they were powerless to act, under GDPR.
Under GDPR anyone whose information is held by third party has to give explicit consent for their data to be used. However, without the explicit consent of the artist, police are unable to act on this information. Continue reading “Under GDPR police are unable to arrest a graffiti artist who used his own name”
Statistics are a commonly cited aspect of football analysis, but how much do we really know about the numbers we throw around? We got in touch with Big Dave from OPTA ’s data measuring department, to break down the stats.
One major innovation in recent years has been the advent of expected goals (XG), something Dave revealed to have a complex analytical process behind it; “If a team has an XG of 1.5, but they haven’t scored at all, then our statistical models would rate that team as ‘utter shit’. Similarly, if a team has an XG of almost zero but a total goals of exactly 1, we would rate that team as ‘Burnley’. However, if a team has an XG of 2 but they have scored 4, our statistical models would rate that team as ‘probably containing Messi’.” Continue reading “OPTA Statistics, Are they telling the whole story?”
A Pro Brexit public protest has received massive, and unexpected support, from millions of people in the North West.
Brexiteers arranged a ‘Go Slow’ on the M62. The idea is that they would form up into lines, across the carriage way and drive along at a steady forty miles an hour, thereby holding up all the traffic. This was supposed to send a signal to Parliament that ‘The People’ would not tolerate a delay to Brexit. Continue reading “Pro Brexit ‘Go Slow’ protest on the M62 backfires as journey times speed up”
Concerns are growing amongst the group dubbed ‘new men’, that their partners have rumbled their inner Neanderthal nature.
Psychologists have defined this internal world as their sub-conscious ‘Benny Hill’. Now women have rumbled their little game and are not happy about it. Awkward questions have been raised. Continue reading “New Men are barely evolved semi-sentient apes”
Church of England officials are horrified at the Conservatives latest parliamentary bill; proposing to bring Easter forward, in a bid to resurrect Margaret Thatcher.
With hope fading fast for a satisfactory end to the Brexit shit-shamble, this radical plan seems the only option. The exhumation of the Iron Lady seems the only way to rekindle the belief of the Tory Faithful.
Continue reading “Margaret Thatcher to be resurrected on Easter Sunday”