Red Nose Day man in the pubMonkey Business

Red Nose Day Appeal – A man goes to the pub

Red Nose Day comes around again. Once more, some very nice people set out to persuade you to give them some money, so you don’t have to think about something bad. This time they’re doing it with funny jokes and sketches, plus Alan Partridge and James Corden.

Ian Napton decided to enter into the spirit of the event by pledging, to go to the pub for the evening.

He explained, “Someone at work mentioned that Red Nose Day was on and, quick as a flash, I thought; ‘That’s a handy excuse to go to the pub for the evening’. So, I told the missus I was off to The Drunken Monkey for the night.”

Along with the other pub regulars, Ian plans to spend the evening; drinking beer, talking bollocks, pissing on his shoes, ogling the barmaid and telling some bloke he has never met before that he loves him, before picking up a kebab and staggering home.

If things work out as they should, there will be a loud argument about the state of the country; before asserting that our MP’s are a bunch of self-serving wankers who don’t know what it’s like living in the real world.

When asked about whether he was raising money for Red Nose Day, Mr Napton explained he wasn’t. Adding, “If you want to give money to charity, give it. It doesn’t make you a better person because you donated to some twat who liked cycling and wanted a free holiday riding the Great Wall of China. Now, I’ll have a pint of large*.”


The origin of the Red Nose Day Story

This is borne out of the annual, charity telethons with their relentless tugging of the heart strings and the moral apathy that accompanies this. 

The* is an homage to the purveyor of far fetched fiction, the lad himself, Robert Rankin. If you’ve never read, I would urge you to do so. 

Here is a link to last years; https://chattychimp.co/children-in-tweed-appeal/

Those wanting to support Red Nose Day, can do so here; https://www.comicrelief.com/

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