Blue Peter have launched their biggest appeal yet, to save the endangered species, Great Britain.
So extreme is the crisis, that the sticky-backed plastic entrepreneurs, have offered not only a Gold Blue Peter badge as a prize but unrestricted access to the House of Commons and a lifetime peerage, as well.
Tension is mounting, to abate the Brexit beast, before it pushes the UK to complete extinction. Blue Peter presenter, Lindsey Russell, imploring children to get involved told us, ‘’We are always looking at ways to improve the planet and to make our future more sustainable. Without drastic action, all of our futures are looking pretty bleak.’’
Theresa May has denied the initiative smacked of desperation, insisting that it was to, ’’incorporate the views of the young people, to ensure the will of all the people is accurately represented.’’
It has been confirmed that the winner, will be instantly promoted to Brexit secretary, then sent to Brussels for negotiations. The EU have welcomed these developments, commenting, ’’Finally, a plan. We are looking forward to holding some intelligent conversations at long last.’’