Cerberus becomes head receptionist at a busy Doctors Surgery

Cerberus, the viscous three headed guardian of the underworld has taken over as Head Receptionist at Birmingham’s busy Gwyneth Paltrow GP Surgery.

Dr Ian Napton defended the radical appointment “With the Government’s health service cuts, GP lists are too long. In order to fit in golf and holidays we need to ensure Doctor’s see the fewest number of people. The Receptionist plays a key role in keeping patients out of the surgery with only the most determined getting an appointment.”

Patients where ecstatic at the news “It’s about time. The last receptionist we had was a right gorgon. After 5 years, I still haven’t found out if I’m even registered at the surgery, let alone got into see a Doctor.”┬ásaid one.

Hades, King of The Underworld said, “After several millennia guarding Hell, Cerberus was becoming depressed. She’d stopped eating the religious, ruined my best slippers and her mange had gotten out of control. The vet suggested a change of scene would help. luckily this job came up. We were worried about how she’d take to living in Birmingham but in many respects it was just like being at home. It’s a depressing sink hole of a place filled with the souls of the damned, she loves it.”

If successful other surgeries are expected to follow suit, with Boudica, Shelob, Medusa and Margaret Rutherford being lined up for similar positions.