“Well, what a night for the Brexit Party. A party which didn’t even exist two years ago and won’t exist any more in a few weeks’ time.
This is the greatest of victories. We may have no seats but we’ve polled nearly three million votes across the country and we’ve had a couple of almost seconds, several fourths and an honourable mention in Rochester. Clearly we are in tune with the British people.
I can hear her Maj saying ‘Arise Sir Nigel De Kent’
“Nigel, sorry, I must interrupt your incessant droning on here in the studio as Jeremy Corbyn is about to speak.”
“I have telephoned Mr Johnson in the last half-hour and congratulated him on becoming the prime minister. However, despite falling short by 159 seats, this is a far, far greater victory for the Labour Party.
Although we have failed to win it’s still a stunning victory for the Labour Party
In an unexpected turn of events, Prince Andrew is now the favourite to become the next prime minister.
“It’s obvious,” voter Ian Napton, told us. “He’s more trustworthy than Boris Johnson.”
the Grand Old Duke of York he had 10,000 … well let’s not get into that
“And on this week’s Celebrity Countdown, we have Jeremy from North London. Playing him is Boris from Somerset. Welcome gents, and Boris, get us underway with your choice of letters, please.”
Jeremy, I know he is but You can’t use that four letter word I’m afraid
Christmas is coming and The FA has the ideal present for the football fan in your life!
The FA proudly presents its new double album, Now that’s what I call Football’s Greatest Hits!
Dirty Northern Bastards and other festive hits!