Gerald has been running around the country, flinging poo, for many years. He is no longer wild, merely slightly annoyed.
In the TV scoop of the century, ITV have signed up Idris Elba to move into Coronation Street.
With Idris’s schedule suddenly clear after a two year stint, not playing Bond, ITV were quick to capture the world’s sexiest man.
Continue reading “Idris Elba moves into Coronation Street”
Amazingly, Bristol has beaten off stiff competition from Paris, Amsterdam, Frankfurt and Rome to be crowned: The Cocaine Capital of Europe.
Competition judges toured Europe, before declaring Bristol the winner. The Italian Judge, Gianni Napatone, explained, “
We ranked each city on: supply, purity, price and the likelihood of getting busted. Bristol came out top in all categories. Continue reading “Bristol is crowned the cocaine capital of Europe”
Rugby Union is undertaking a re-branding exercise in order to address the disparity between the popularity of International Rugby and its’ decline at club level.
Bizarrely, millions of people don’t seem prepared to spend Saturday afternoons, in the cold and the rain, watching a bunch of fat lads chunter about a muddy field.
Continue reading “Rugby Union to be renamed ‘Bundle!’”
Maurizio Sarri, famous for his unusual methods, may have gone a step too far, with the appointment of British Prime Minister, Theresa May as Chelsea’s goal keeping coach.
Having signed Kepa Arrizabalaga for a world record fee, Sarri was keen to develop the mental side of the young keeper’s game.
Continue reading “Chelsea’s use of Theresa May as goal keeping coach, spectacularly back-fires in The League Cup Final”
As the Brexapocalypse looms, applications for an Irish Passport have reached record levels. Wealthy Brits see it as a form of insurance against leaving the EU.
Irish Government spokesman, Rory Napton said,
“We’re knocking passports out at £2,000 a pop to anyone who wants one, it’s a great money-spinner.” Continue reading “As the Brexapocalypse looms everyone is claiming an Irish passport”