Fighters at WTF Wrestling have been queuing up at Birmingham Primark in order to hone key combat skills.
Wrestling coaches were amazed at the strength, speed and physical co-ordination shown by bargain hunting Primark shoppers. They also found Primark customers power to weight ratio presented their wrestlers with a “bloody good workout“. Continue reading “WTF Wrestlers work out at Primark”
Following on from Facebook’s appointment of Nick Clegg, other despotic personality cults have been looking to employ ex-leaders of the Liberal Democrats.
Their former leader Tim Farron, has resurfaced after laying low for a while. Now unexpectedly employed as the Home Secretary in Brunei, his centrepiece policy decision “Gays to be stoned to death” was unveiled by his new boss, The Sultan, yesterday. Continue reading “Gays get stoned but not in a good way”
The EU has become frustrated at Britain’s repeated request for Brexit extensions. Donald Tusk’s stole the Prime Minister’s headlines by suggesting a flextension, Not to be outdone, Theresa May has come up with a cunning plan of her own. Brexit is to be delayed until tomorrow. Continue reading “Brexit has been delayed until tomorrow”
Gladiator Schools are to be re-introduced into Britain in an effort to reduce soaring levels of knife violence amongst teenagers.
The novel suggestion was made by Sir Christopher Chope MP, during a discussion with senior police officers. Continue reading “Gladiator Schools to be reintroduced to help fight knife crime”
After tagging his own name, a graffiti artist has got away with his crime after Police admitted they were powerless to act, under GDPR.
Under GDPR anyone whose information is held by third party has to give explicit consent for their data to be used. However, without the explicit consent of the artist, police are unable to act on this information. Continue reading “Under GDPR police are unable to arrest a graffiti artist who used his own name”
A Pro Brexit public protest has received massive, and unexpected support, from millions of people in the North West.
Brexiteers arranged a ‘Go Slow’ on the M62. The idea is that they would form up into lines, across the carriage way and drive along at a steady forty miles an hour, thereby holding up all the traffic. This was supposed to send a signal to Parliament that ‘The People’ would not tolerate a delay to Brexit. Continue reading “Pro Brexit ‘Go Slow’ protest on the M62 backfires as journey times speed up”