“It was a serendipitous discovery, we were looking at creating a new vaginal douche and had been experimenting with scents based on the odours of celebrities, Gwyneth, Jim Davidson and Piers Morgan as examples.It must work, have you seen a vampire?
Heroic Boris Johnson admits British Soldiers will die in the Middle-East but it’s a sacrifice he’s willing to make. albeit not personally.
“Be under no illusion, I am prepared to do anything Donald Trump wants me to do, be it selling contaminated food, giving him the NHS or allowing young northerners to die horribly, thousands of miles from home. It’s a sacrifice I am willing to make, in order to get a trade deal and because he’s my real daddy.”Bombs away!
It’s gala awards season, and last night the award winning Flowry Hotel played host to the Pointless Awards Award Ceremony.
These awards recognise those who work so tirelessly, to come up with completely meaningless awards, simply so advertisers can label companies, businesses and products as Award Winning.Continue reading “The Pointless Awards Ceremony – Valuing the valueless”
Diplomacy between the UK and the USA is being tested early in the New Year following the assassination of Qasem Soleimani.
The UK would ordinarily have expected to have been informed in advance that military action was being taken, but this wasn’t the case. Downing Street is understood to be “disappointed.”
A spokesman for the prime minister told us, “Boris is furious. Had he received the customary tip-off, he and his rich pals would have piled into oil, making a swift profit, selling before the weekend arrived. This has cost a lot of money.”Buy, buy, bYE!
Following the sudden and unexpected death of the noted psychic, spiritualist and medium, Derek Acorah, Living TV has announced details of their exclusive rights to his next series, Death is not the Final Word.Hear my message from beyond the grave, send me your money!