UKIP and Pro Brexit protest

Home Office say’s the UK is overcrowded by 17 Million and proposes to deport the Leave Voters

The Home Office says there are too many people in the U.K. The optimum population number is 50 million, 17 million below the actual number living here. A task force was set up to establish which 17 million people need to be deported.

Borough Market, a little pretentious? Surely not

After a northerner slags off Borough Market the locals suggests he sticks to Wetherspoons as ‘he will feel more at home there’

Indignation spread across the artisan market community, when a crudely worded complaint was propagated on social media.

Tourist Trevor Manley, who can only be described as ‘northern’, felt that his visit to Borough Market was ‘poor value for money.’

Feeling ‘misunderstood and undervalued for their quintessential craft-personship’, stall holders responded bitterly, by suggesting that Manley had not appreciated the market’s ‘exemplary ambience’.

Scientists prove that when mummy needs some help around the house, daddy’s bound to have buggered off again

Scientists have unveiled an algorithm relating to men, which plots the converse law of need, verses availability, in times of urgency.

Dubbed the McPhee paper, extensive research into male behaviour patterns, suggested that the greater the severity of the family crisis, the least likely they are to be contactable.

Generation Teen win praise for their valuable contribution to our community, not

Generation teen have been commended, for their ongoing contribution to the community.

Special thanks goes to their passionate use of raucous vocabulary, as it ensures that everyone within a mile radius can feel included in their conversation. Seeing adolescent romance played out at the bus-stop, has been likened to viewing modern Shakespeare. One drama fan, Gillian Napton mused, ‘’Hearing such lively banter after a long shift, is the highlight of my day. ’’