Concerns are growing amongst the group dubbed ‘new men’, that their partners have rumbled their inner Neanderthal nature.
Psychologists have defined this internal world as their sub-conscious ‘Benny Hill’. Now women have rumbled their little game and are not happy about it. Awkward questions have been raised. Continue reading “New Men are barely evolved semi-sentient apes”
Church of England officials are horrified at the Conservatives latest parliamentary bill; proposing to bring Easter forward, in a bid to resurrect Margaret Thatcher.
With hope fading fast for a satisfactory end to the Brexit shit-shamble, this radical plan seems the only option. The exhumation of the Iron Lady seems the only way to rekindle the belief of the Tory Faithful.
Continue reading “Margaret Thatcher to be resurrected on Easter Sunday”
Scientists, working at the University of Life, have concluded that Nigel Farage is not The Messiah, he’s not even a vary naughty boy!
The confusion arose when Nigel pledged to walk 250 of his people out of oppression and tyranny, to the promised land of London. He’d even laid on a bus.
One noted theologian said, “No, hang on! Isn’t that Moses?”
Continue reading “He’s Not The Messiah, he’s not even a naughty boy”
As John Bercow stops Theresa May from bringing her EU Withdrawal Bill back to the House of Commons, drastic action was called for. Step forward super schemer, Francis Underwood.
The Speaker ruled that the bill was not ‘sufficiently different’ from the previous two versions The House had already voted on. Consequently, Parliamentary Rules stop it from coming back to The House, again.
Continue reading “Francis Underwood called in to help Theresa May get her deal through”
Psychologists, working at the School of Life, have confirmed the existence of PTBD, Post Traumatic Brexit Disorder.
Unheard of before 2016, the condition is now thought to be seriously affecting the mental well being of some 60 million people. Psychologists are asking for urgent steps to be taken in order to reduce the mental trauma currently ruining the lives of millions. Although, ironically, they don’t know what those steps are.
Continue reading “PTBD – Psychologists confirm Post Traumatic Brexit Disorder, is a thing”
The Governor Of California, Gavin Newsom, has announced a moratorium on carrying out the death penalty. Thus providing a temporary reprieve for the more than 700 people, on the State’s death row.
A spokesman for the Governor, Ian Napton, said, “He thinks that killing people doesn’t really set the best example. You wouldn’t believe how incredibly expensive it is, so he’s proposing to stop doing it. However, he’s asking if citizens could meet him halfway and stop killing one another, too, that would be lovely. Then there wouldn’t be newcomers clogging up his death row. It’s terribly busy.” Continue reading “Death penalty reprieve really annoys Donald Trump”