Rumours in Whitehall are rife today the health secretary, Matt Hancock, is preparing an expletive filled speech concerning the Covid-19 crisis with people not observing the social distancing guidelines.Look you c*&7, stay the f*7^ away
The signer for the deaf at Boris Johnson’s coronavirus update press conference was accused of using sign language of an inappropriate kind today.Would you mind repeating that!
Following Boris Johnson’s positive test, Mark Francois is to be the next Prime Minister
Downing Street sources quickly identified the touchy-feely Boris Johnson as the super-spreader. Consequently, everyone he has had contact with has been isolated, including all cabinet ministers. Now, the search for a new leader is on.I always new my time would come, I’m ready to serve my country, where is my potato-peeler?
Following criticism that they have failed to provide sufficient, suitable, protective equipment for front line NHS staff, the Government has announced an exclusive deal for Anne Summers to supply a range of gimp wear.oOOH! Matron, can I bring my own?