Boris Johnson has told Jeremy Corbyn, that his Dad is harder than Jezza’s Dad and if he doesn’t get a general election, his Dad will be round to give him a jolly good thumping.
The inclusion of Boris’s Dad in the argument represents a serious racking up of tension between the two boys. Initially, Boris had threatened to send his brother Jo round to do the duffing but the elder sibling declined, stating that Bozo was ‘a spoilt little brat’.
Trouble in the playground
Jeremy Corbyn was arrested under The Terrorism Act. He has since been released as there is insufficient evidence that he is trying to bring down the Government.
After having been outed by The Daily Mail as a terrorist many years ago, Jeremy Corbyn has been on the official watchlist as a ‘significant’ threat to an effective Tory Government. However, the risks may have been exaggerated.
What do we want? We dont’t know, When do we want it? Never
Surprise across Westminster after an MP was suspended, pending an enquiry into allegations of sexual misconduct.
Whilst Parliament had been rife with rumours as to the identity of the MP in question, heavy money had been bet on it being Boris Johnson. Much to the tousle-haired rogue’s relief, it turned out to be someone else.
What do you mean it wasn’t Boris?
Parliament’s Saturday Session has been cancelled as it contravenes the EU Working Time Directive.
Boris Johnson’ Saturday session of the House of Commons has been cancelled. Consequently, The Speaker confirmed that the proposed session would put MPs in breach of the EU Working Time Directive, so couldn’t go ahead.
Work? On a Saturday? Are you mad?
The EU has delayed the response to Boris Johnson’s proposals for a Withdrawal Agreement, as they cannot agree on the best way to tell him to Fuck Off.
All 27 nations are united in agreeing that his proposals were a publicity stunt in the first place and that he was never serious about coming to an agreement. However, they have become divided as to how to tell him to do one.
Here pal, do one!