Heroic Boris Johnson admits British Soldiers will die in the Middle-East but it’s a sacrifice he’s willing to make. albeit not personally.
“Be under no illusion, I am prepared to do anything Donald Trump wants me to do, be it selling contaminated food, giving him the NHS or allowing young northerners to die horribly, thousands of miles from home. It’s a sacrifice I am willing to make, in order to get a trade deal and because he’s my real daddy.”
Diplomacy between the UK and the USA is being tested early in the New Year following the assassination of Qasem Soleimani.
The UK would ordinarily have expected to have been informed in advance that military action was being taken, but this wasn’t the case. Downing Street is understood to be “disappointed.”
A spokesman for the prime minister told us, “Boris is furious. Had he received the customary tip-off, he and his rich pals would have piled into oil, making a swift profit, selling before the weekend arrived. This has cost a lot of money.”
Tensions are mounting, between a politically disparate couple, in the wake of the general election result.
Contentions reached fever pitch, when Ian Napton surprised his wife Gillian, by redecorating their semi-detached house, entirely with Boris Blue festive decorations. Delighted with his handy work, Ian commented, ‘Boris is our man for sure. I consider myself thoroughly middle-class, especially as I’ve bought a four-wheel-drive on finance, wear Barbour wellies and jeer at homeless people.’