Tag: Brexit

Theresa May calls in immigrant workers to replace Brexit cabinet shortfall

New immigrant ministers arrive in uk

Following the latest spate of cabinet resignations, Theresa May was faced with a serious staffing shortfall. In order to solve this problem she has been forced to draught in immigrant ministers from The West Indies.

As the first batch of ministers arrived to help out, the Daily Mail was incandescent with rage. They claimed these immigrant ministers simply won’t understand our culture, or how our government works. Before adding that they would still be living here in 40 years time, probably on benefits.
Continue reading “Theresa May calls in immigrant workers to replace Brexit cabinet shortfall”

Petition to replace with Theresa May with NZ PM, Jacinda Arden, tops 20 Million signatures

Jacinda Ardern appeal

Following the record-breaking success of last week’s petition to the Government to revoke Article 50, the petitions website has crashed again.

Petitioner Ian Napton said, “I was caught up in the euphoria of so many millions of people venting against Brexit and thought I’d start a petition of my own.”

Continue reading “Petition to replace with Theresa May with NZ PM, Jacinda Arden, tops 20 Million signatures”

Grayling Airways flight to Dusseldorf lands at Edinburgh Airport

Edinburgh Airport

Fully a week before April Fool’s Day, Grayling Airways surprised their passengers today by landing a plane in the wrong country and welcoming passengers to their unintended destination.

Eyebrows were quickly raised after touchdown when a Grayling aircraft with call sign G-OHNO taxied towards the terminal at Edinburgh Airport and a large “Welcome to Edinburgh” sign hoved into view. Continue reading “Grayling Airways flight to Dusseldorf lands at Edinburgh Airport”

1 Million turn up for Central London’s ‘I have a banner’ day

INternational I have a banner day

This year’s ‘I have a banner’ day was declared a huge success, as over a million banner and placard enthusiasts took to the streets of London to show off their work.

Following on from the recent commemorative days, such as; ‘Take your frog to work day’, the ‘International Day of Happy Slapping’  and ‘Tickle a Donut Day’, March 23rd  was designated ‘I have a banner’ Day. Continue reading “1 Million turn up for Central London’s ‘I have a banner’ day”

Pro Brexit ‘Go Slow’ protest on the M62 backfires as journey times speed up

Pro Brexit Traffic Jam

A Pro Brexit public protest has received massive, and unexpected support, from millions of people in the North West. 

Brexiteers arranged a ‘Go Slow’ on the M62. The idea is that they would form up into lines, across the carriage way and drive along at a steady forty miles an hour, thereby holding up all the traffic. This was supposed to send a signal to Parliament that ‘The People’ would not tolerate a delay to Brexit.  Continue reading “Pro Brexit ‘Go Slow’ protest on the M62 backfires as journey times speed up”

Margaret Thatcher to be resurrected on Easter Sunday

Margaret Thatcher Funeral procession

Church of England officials are horrified at the Conservatives latest parliamentary bill; proposing to bring Easter forward, in a bid to resurrect Margaret Thatcher.

With hope fading fast for a satisfactory end to the Brexit shit-shamble, this radical plan seems the only option. The exhumation of the Iron Lady seems the only way to rekindle the belief of the Tory Faithful.
Continue reading “Margaret Thatcher to be resurrected on Easter Sunday”

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