Tag: Business

Discovery of a giant Golden McNuggett sparks Scottish gold rush

Tempted by riches beyond compare and the glory of finding the next big thing in over-priced, pretentious gastronomy; fast-food vendors, pop-up restauranters and panhandlers have been making their way to the Scottish Highlands in search of the fabled Golden McNuggett.

Aye, it’s every bit as delicious as they say. You’ll have another slice of square sausage, will ye not?

With a 2-1 defeat at Man Utd, Mourinho announces that ‘He’s Back!’

Many sports fans agree that since Mourinho’s sacking by Manchester United the Premier League has been a far duller place. Whilst his appointment as the Spurs manager took the football world by surprise, many fans greeted the announcement with a gentle chuckle.

yes, my methods are mysterious and wonderous

Musk says ‘Tesla Ich bin ein Binliner’

Brexiteers have reacted with indignation over Tesla’s decision to base its European Gigafactory in Germany.

Elon Musk, the company’s high profile founder, said that Brexit uncertainty made it “too risky” to locate the factory in Britain, despite the small army of soon-to-be-unemployed car factory workers here he could potentially have taken on.

Don’t mention the war.

Fat Cats get to work fewer hours for more money

Fat Cat City workers are demanding that they should now only have to work part-time hours.

Traders, Big Wigs and other City types have complained that the long hours they work cause them to have insufficient time to spend all of their money, and they should now be allowed to work from 9.00 till 4.00 only.

Buy! Buy! Sell! Sell! Right, time to trouser the readies