Toshitone Ind is rated a buy

Toshitone Ltd has a stock market value of £100 Billion but hasn’t made a profit in 10 years

Toshitone Ltd has been valued, by The City, at £100 billion pounds. Investors are queuing up to give their money to the innovative car company, at its stock market launch. 

Having revolutionised the funeral business, with their self driving hearses, and cornered the automated Pizza and Cocaine delivery market, things are on the up for the company.  

Bristol Man snorting cocaine from an I Pad

Bristol is crowned the cocaine capital of Europe

Amazingly, Bristol has beaten off stiff competition from Paris, Amsterdam, Frankfurt and Rome to be crowned: The Cocaine Capital of Europe.

Competition judges toured Europe, before declaring Bristol the winner.  The Italian Judge, Gianni Napatone, explained, “We ranked each city on: supply, purity, price and the likelihood of getting busted. Bristol came out top in all categories.