Tag: Covid-19

As air quality improves the Eiffel Tower is now visible from The Shard

With the lockdown in full operation, air pollution levels continue to fall. This has delivered an unexpected bonus, people can now see things that are usually obscured by the haze. For Example, it’s now possible to see The Eiffel Tower, Paris, from the roof-top terrace at The Shard, London.

Mais oui, but we cannot see The Shard as we are looking North

God, the Big G, the Lad Himself, has decided to self-isolate

He has been a little under the weather lately. Concerns about his health surfaced when he noted his ambrosia tasted a little off. Feeling shivery with a dry cough and his sense of taste and smell is absent, Dr McCoy, G’s personal physician, has confined Our Lord to quarters, for the next two weeks.

God’s just being careful
While God’s away, prayers will be unanswered, keys unfound and orgasms unsatisfied

Remember to delete your browsing history before you’re admitted to hospital

With rapidly rising death rates, the Government are appealing to people to delete their internet browsing histories.

As people die suddenly, families are trawling through computers and laptops, in search of accounts with money in. Much to their surprise, they’re discovering some rather sensitive material.

He searched for what?

Highgate Head claims being a ‘Shakra and Vibration Guru’ doesn’t qualify you as a key worker

A Highgate school has ‘vehemently rejected’, an angry parent’s plea, to allow her child to continue schooling as normal.

Back to school
Back to school you little git

Self-proclaimed ‘shakra and vibration guru’, Olivia Napton, claims that as ‘an energy shaman’, she should be considered a ‘key-worker’, therefore allowing her daughter Brabantia-Dragonflower, uninterrupted education.

What do you mean I am not providing an essential service!