ERG announce they have finally finished their study into Europe

The European Research Group has announced the completion of their 3-year, £250,000 Government funded, study into Europe, all of it.

Project Leader and Chief Scientist, Professor Jacob Rees-Mogg, was suitably delighted at the successful completion of his academic paper. “We are delighted to reveal that after a series of studies, experiments and visits we can confirm that Europe is exactly what we thought it was in the first place. It’s full of Johnnie Foreigners.”

Lounge lizard reclines

Jacob Rees-Mogg to become the face of lounge furniture

A bespoke armchair and chaise-longue manufacturer have chosen Conservative MP Jacob Rees-Mogg to be the brand ambassador and new face of their company: PomPosity.

Mr Rees-Mogg shall appear in a series of televisual adverts for the company, and will ‘pose in a variety of positions’, showing off the range of products PomPosity have to offer.

Fetherlite Elite

Keep Calm and Remain In

Controversy is surging through the Department of Education today as the vexed subject of sex education raises its head again.

Addressing Britain’s poor record on teenage pregnancies is a priority for the new Education Minister, Dr Ian Napton. “Have you been to Burnley lately and seen the number of young women pushing buggies? It’s unacceptable, and it’s costing the country a fortune in social housing. It’s very easy to control fertility, so we have to educate our young people.