Jeremy says No

Jeremy Corbyn issues letter announcing his candidacy for Tory Leader

Yesterday Jeremy Corbyn issued a letter formally announcing his candidacy for the position of Tory Party Leader.

In what his supporters labelled as a cunning and daring move, Mr Corbyn has decided to enter the contest long after the winner was crowned. His fans claim he is both the master of the long game and a daring and revolutionary political genius.

Jeremy Corbyn Makes up his mind

Corbyn confirms support for 2nd Brexit referendum or does he?

Jeremy Corbyn has confirmed that the Labour Party will campaign to Remain in the EU under a second referendum, which is not happening, unless Britain supports a decision to leave.

In the clearest statement yet from the Labour supremo, it was announced that Labour might support Brexit, or it might not, and it definitely wouldn’t support no deal or a damaging Tory Brexit unless the Unions said it was okay to do so, which they haven’t so far.

Hat Stand more useful than a councillor

Hat Stand wins seat on council in local election

Conservatives faced their biggest backlash yet, when a hat stand won by a landslide, in the Tandridge district local elections.

Demoralized Tandridge locals, used their ballot papers, to emphasise their seething mistrust in Tory tactics, by favouring an inanimate object, claiming it was at least ‘fit for purpose.’

New immigrant ministers arrive in uk

Theresa May calls in immigrant workers to replace Brexit cabinet shortfall

Following the latest spate of cabinet resignations, Theresa May was faced with a serious staffing shortfall. In order to solve this problem she has been forced to draught in immigrant ministers from The West Indies.

As the first batch of ministers arrived to help out, the Daily Mail was incandescent with rage. They claimed these immigrant ministers simply won’t understand our culture, or how our government works. Before adding that they would still be living here in 40 years time, probably on benefits.