Tag: Police

Line of Duty returns for 6th series with even more acronyms

LoD creator Jed Mercurio has confirmed that the series will return for a 6th series, and it will be chock full of bright new acronyms and abbreviations.

“The thing is coming up with all those acronyms series after series is the really hard part. If we put in enough random letters, everyone just sits there trying to work them out and fails to notice we just repeated the first season again and again.”

LoD back for s6, with a new OCG in AF12

Ministry Of Defence lock up lazy Scottish Tourist

A tourist has been arrested after accidentally loitering on the steps of the Ministry of Defence.

Tom Merton, (25) from Glasgow, was enjoying his Ryvita and £8 cup of London coffee when he found himself being handcuffed, gagged and manhandled by armed Ministry of Defence Police who clearly have nothing better to do with their time.

You can’t sit there

The Incredible Hulk loses his testicles on a visit to Luxembourg

The Incredible Hulk visited Luxembourg for a very important meeting with his good friend, Xavier. In order to make The Hulk feel welcome, Xav had arranged for a crowd to gather outside to chant The Hulk’s name, this was the sort of thing he liked. Unfortunately, the mob had received the wrong memo and they were most uncomplimentary.

Faced with a rowdy mob to deal with, the Incredible Hulk went off to the Little Boy’s Chambre to compose himself. It was then that he discovered his big green balls were missing.

You won’t like me when I’m mad

Police Service to provide more officers for criminals to attack

The Government recently announced an increase of twenty thousand police officers on the streets of England and Wales.

This reverse of policy is surprising as the Tories have presided over police numbers dropping by some 19,000 since they have been in power resulting in a marked increase in the level of violent crime on our streets.

Now then! Now then! Now then!

All Social Media posts will have to be ‘Police Approved’

As the right to be offended brigade swings into action the Government has announced that all Social Media posts require Police approval. The increasing number of people who have become upset after seeing something on the Internet has reached epidemic proportions.  

In order to meet the additional workload, The Police Service are diverting officers from proper police work, like catching; TV Licence dodgers, speeding footballers, Wetherspoon drinkers and the homeless. Now they will ensure that no-one is in the least bit offended by some asinine comment posted on social media.

go on, You know you want to!