Tag: RIP

RIP – Boris ‘Bozo’ Johnson the best PM we never had

Boris beaten off

Sadly, Bozo Johnson has suddenly died. Details are sketchy but it appears he suffered an unfortunate accident with a mashie-niblick, after his best friend unexpectedly returned from golf. The lady of the house was unharmed.

Due to become Prime Minister, the untimely death of the noted scamp, womaniser and disingenuous motherfucker has deprived the country of one of the best leaders we never had.

Continue reading “RIP – Boris ‘Bozo’ Johnson the best PM we never had”

RIP – Boris ‘Bozo’ Johnson the best PM we never had

Britain's Kennedy, Bozo Johnson dies

Sadly, Bozo Johnson has suddenly died. Details are sketchy but it appears he suffered an unfortunate accident with a mashie-niblick, after his best friend unexpectedly returned from golf. The lady of the house was unharmed.

Due to become Prime Minister, the untimely death of the noted scamp, womaniser and disingenuous motherfucker has deprived the country of one of the best leaders we never had.
Continue reading “RIP – Boris ‘Bozo’ Johnson the best PM we never had”

RIP – the lion hearted champion of truth, decency and traditional, white, middle-class values, that was The Daily Mail

Daily Mail preaching to the choir

In the modern era of high-quality online news websites, The Daily Mail has finally announced its imminent closure.

We haven’t printed any truthful news for nearly thirty years,” said Deputy Editor, Ian Napton. “Nobody here could accept how The Conservative Party treated Margaret, and our hearts haven’t quite been in it ever since. We run stories about house prices, cancer, immigrants, The Royal Family and the EU because people expect us to, but truthfully, I pay my twelve year old daughter a fiver a week to write those.” Continue reading “RIP – the lion hearted champion of truth, decency and traditional, white, middle-class values, that was The Daily Mail”

RIP Sir Christopher Chode* MP a stalwart fighter for traditional Victorian values

Britain sadly lost one of it’s most passionate and vocal advocates for Victorian Values and Women’s Rights.

Few have gone further in protecting the legacy of women as property, than Sir Christopher Chode MP. A political titan, described as a man for whom the 20th Century never happened, a resolute upholder of tradition and defender of outdated modes of thought. Continue reading “RIP Sir Christopher Chode* MP a stalwart fighter for traditional Victorian values”

RIP – Sir Cliff Pritchard India’s greatest rocker

High profile singer, Christian and bachelor, Sir Cliff Pritchard, has passed away, aged 78.

The singer, whose natural audience all died some thirty to forty years ago, continued to publish dreadful music until his untimely death. Music journalists have redefined the word “untimely” especially for Sir Cliff, to mean “at least twenty-five years too late.” Continue reading “RIP – Sir Cliff Pritchard India’s greatest rocker”

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