Search and Rescue helicopter called out to find missing Edinburgh Festival journalist.
A Guardian journalist has now been missing for 3 days and local police have upgraded their alert status from critical to pretentious.
Save the illiterati
Here at The Chatty Chimp we are delighted to announce the journalistic coup of the week. We’ve managed to sign Boris Johnson as a writer on our little paper.
It wasn’t easy getting Boris to give up his £275,000 per year column at the Daily Torygraph, but the offer of free peanuts, bananas, tea, his own tyre swing and the promise of first crack at the new interns did the trick.
lEGE pLUS!
Top Trip Advisor reviewer, Tommy Robinson, returns to The Pentonville Hotel to see if it’s taken his previous comments on board.
Last time Tommy stayed at The Pentonville he only gave it a one-star rating. He was very critical of the facilities, food and atmosphere. He also felt that the room service was far below the standard expected from such a busy hotel.
The Pen’s Governor, Ian Napton, says they’ve taken notice of Tommy’s comments and have worked hard to make major improvements.
it’s enough to drive you stir crazy!
In a revelation that is set to rock the world of sciencing the Daily Mail Online’s (DMO) investigative researchers examined over 100,000 images of scantily clad women before announcing the outstanding discovery that women have breasts.
Click here to read more
As the right to be offended brigade swings into action the Government has announced that all Social Media posts require Police approval. The increasing number of people who have become upset after seeing something on the Internet has reached epidemic proportions.
In order to meet the additional workload, The Police Service are diverting officers from proper police work, like catching; TV Licence dodgers, speeding footballers, Wetherspoon drinkers and the homeless. Now they will ensure that no-one is in the least bit offended by some asinine comment posted on social media.
go on, You know you want to!
Nanny Napton’s children bought her a Laptop so she could stay in touch with her growing family. Ian, her 14-year-old grandson was charged with teaching her how to use it.
After a few basic lessons she was hooked up to social media accounts, had been shopping online, was commenting on articles and threads and looking at photographs galore on Instagram.
Continue reading “Typing BBC into Google gave Grandma a bit of a shock”
