Tag: Wetherspoons

Heavy Snowflake falls across the country

Brexit Day saw heavy falls of Snowflake in middle England, Scotland and The Home Counties.

The Met Office were caught out by yesterday’s heavy fall of Snowflake. This was especially surprising as the air temperature was a very respectable 10 degrees.

Heavy falls of Snowflake in Islington
There, there, dry your tears!

WTF Wrestlers work out at Primark

Fighters at WTF Wrestling have been queuing up at Birmingham Primark in order to hone key combat skills. 

Wrestling coaches were amazed at the strength, speed and physical co-ordination shown by bargain hunting Primark shoppers. They also found Primark customers power to weight ratio presented their wrestlers with a “bloody good workout“. Continue reading “WTF Wrestlers work out at Primark”

Builders Merchants stunned when a woman knows exactly what she wants

Staff at a well known South London, Builders Merchants  were left dumbfounded yesterday. A woman entered the branch and knew exactly what she needed to buy.

Staff initially felt uncomfortable at the unusual turn of events. Her presence, immediately, doubled the IQ in the building and she appeared resistant to their ‘friendly banter.’ Continue reading “Builders Merchants stunned when a woman knows exactly what she wants”

Shock as Brexit makes buying an Aston Martin more unaffordable for everyday folk

There was outrage and disbelief across the country as Aston Martin revealed the price of their cars would have to rise, following Brexit.

Many of those working on low wages, whose income is topped up by benefits, have seen no increase in payments this year. This means many won’t be able to upgrade to Aston Martin’s latest model. Continue reading “Shock as Brexit makes buying an Aston Martin more unaffordable for everyday folk”

After a northerner slags off Borough Market the locals suggests he sticks to Wetherspoons as ‘he will feel more at home there’

Indignation spread across the artisan market community, when a crudely worded complaint was propagated on social media.

Tourist Trevor Manley, who can only be described as ‘northern’, felt that his visit to Borough Market was ‘poor value for money.’

Feeling ‘misunderstood and undervalued for their quintessential craft-personship’, stall holders responded bitterly, by suggesting that Manley had not appreciated the market’s ‘exemplary ambience’. Continue reading “After a northerner slags off Borough Market the locals suggests he sticks to Wetherspoons as ‘he will feel more at home there’”